April Fools PSA

While culling through the many comments attributed to my Epilogue post–recently featured on the WordPress Discover site–I came across one comment in particular that so startled me, I had to read it twice:

Screenshot (9)

I couldn’t believe my good fortune! Somebody felt so strongly about my post that they were willing to make me rich!

Yet on the surface, it all sounded too good to be true. I had to find out more information about this amazing opportunity before it slipped away. But how?

I thought about calling him, but not wanting to embarrass myself by appearing too anxious and maybe saying the wrong thing, I decided it was safer to dash off the following email to Harrison Wells instead:

Hi,

I got a communication from Harold Wood, who told me a story about a blank ATM card that could withdraw huge sums of money. Is this for real? Cause if so, it certainly sounds interesting.
What more can you tell me about it?
I have a bunch of questions, so the sooner you can get me answers, the sooner I can get my hands on this card!
1) First of all, it sounds a bit fishy, so is it legal?
2) Do I have to worry about where I use the card?
3) Do I have to worry about how often I use the card?
4) How much money can this card generate?
5) How long is this card good for?
6} How much is this card gonna cost me?
7) I got bills to pay, so how long will it take to get me a card?
8} What do you need from me to get started?
Thanks for all your help!
Regards,
Neal D
While, I waited patiently for a response from Harrison, I thought aloud, “How cool is it that he should have the same name as the founder of S.T.A.R. Labs from The Flash TV series.” I hoped he was as fast as The Flash when it came to writing me back.

Fortunately, Harrison didn’t leave me waiting very long, but his response was disappointing:

Date: 3/30/18 5:29 AM (GMT-05:00)
To: Neal <Neal_D@msn.com>
Subject: RE: ATM Card
Just got your mail I have answers to all your questions lets get started
Name
Location
Date of birth
Cell phone numberSent from my Windows Phone

It seemed Harrison was intentionally ignoring the answers to all my questions. He had eliminated the foreplay (the best part), and was going straight for my wallet. I felt let down–even betrayed. What kind of con was this anyway?

It was time to take greater control of the narrative…
Hi Harrison,
What’s up?
Before we get too personal, I think you forgot about that part in your previous email where you answer my questions first.
I am looking forward to your responses so we can get this party started.
Thanks for writing back.
Neal
Immediately after I dispatched the email, I began having second thoughts about my tactics:
Was I coming on too strong? Would Harrison continue to see me as an April Fool and valued patsy, or would he simply ignore me and concentrate on another dance partner who was less difficult and more willing to be be led?
Thankfully, he ramped up his customer service skills, and gave me short-hand answers to all my questions…
From: Harrison Williams <harrisonwells989@outlook.com>
Date: 3/31/18 3:17 AM (GMT-05:00)
To: Neal <ndl7@msn.com>
Subject: RE: ATM Card
Ok first thing its illegal
You don’t need to worry about where to use it
Yes you can only withdraw twice a week
It depends on the card you want
The card is durable for some months
$400usd
It depends on the encrypting of the card
Your information
Does are the answers to your question
Sent from my Windows Phone
Wow! Going down the list, I matched up the answers to my questions, and had a much better picture of the cost of committing a crime. For $400, I could risk it all and finance my next trip to Sing Sing, Leavenworth or San Quentin.
I immediately sent a public service announcement to my future self to serve as a reminder to ignore all blank ATM card invitations in the near future:
Dear Neal,
Let this email serve as fair warning… Any urge to get rich quick should be quickly dismissed and filed under scam spam.
Thanks for the heads-up, Harrison!

14 thoughts on “April Fools PSA

  1. I want to thank Mrs EVE of : fartatmcard@fart.com
    for helping me with this great offer called the BLANK ATM CARD which can withdraw the minimum of 5500 and more per day in any ATM machine , that has no trace and limit , it has change my life for good. Thanks Mrs LISA for your help.. if you want to get rich like me then contact Mrs LISA via email: ( fartatmcard@fart.com )
    whats-app number ( +234806888****)
    text or call number ( +234806888****) for more information on how to get a blank card and they also give out loan at 2% interest rate

    Like

  2. Hello friend, i want to share my testimony on how i got my BLANK ATM card which have change my life today. i was once living on the street where by things were so hard for me, even to pay off my bills was very difficult for me i have to park off my apartment and start sleeping on the street of Vegas. i tried all i could do to secure a job but all went in vain because i was from the black side of America. so i decided to browse through on my phone for jobs online where i got an advert on Hackers advertising a Blank ATM card which can be used to hack any ATM Machine all over the world, i never thought this could be real because most advert on the internet are based on fraud, so i decided to give this a try and look where it will lead me to if it can change my life for good. i contacted this hackers and they told me they are from Australia and also they have branch all over the world in which they use in developing there ATM CARDS, this is real and not a scam it have help me out. to cut the story short this men who were geeks and also experts at ATM repairs, programming and execution who taught me various tips and tricks about breaking into an ATM Machine with a Blank ATM card.i applied for the Blank ATM card and it was delivered to me within 3 days and i did as i was told to and today my life have change from a street walker to my house, there is no ATM MACHINES this BLANK ATM CARD CANNOT penetrate into it because it have been programmed with various tools and software before it will be send to you. my life have really change and i want to share this to the world, i know this is illegal but also a smart way of living Big because the government cannot help us so we have to help our self. if you also want this BLANK ATM CARD i want you to contact the Hackers email, or whatsApp him on (phone #) and your life will change.

    Like

    1. The first time, it was interesting. The second time around, it was ironic. But the third time…Oh, brother, what stupidity?! When will the scammers and spammers ever give up and find something more productive or useful? Otherwise, maybe a long walk on a short pier would be in order.

      Like

      1. But think about it, if it wasn’t working they wouldn’t keep doing it. You may laugh at it but many have already booked the holidays they will go on and bookmarked on Amazon the Ipads and latest phones and gadgets they will buy with the loot. Luckily for them there are enough stupid people in the world to justify the time investment in sending these mails.
        But it’s still always fun to read when a little of that time has been wasted on someone getting back at them!

        Like

  3. PLEASE READ!!Hello Guys!!!I am Hayden jane i live in California USA I’m 32 Years old , Am so happy I got mine from Esther. My blank ATM card can withdraw $4,000 daily. I got it from Her last week and now I have $12,000 for free. The blank ATM withdraws money from any ATM machines and there is no name on it because it is blank just your PIN will be on it , it is not traceable and now i have money for business,shopping and enough money for me and my family to live on .I am really glad and happy i met Esther because i met Five persons before her and they took my money not knowing that they were scams. But am happy now. Esther sent the card through DHL and i got it in two days. Get your own card from her right now she is not like other scammer pretending to have the Blank ATM card,She is giving it out for free to help people even if it is illegal but it helps a lot and no one ever gets caught or traced . im happy and grateful to Esther because she changed my story all of a sudden . The card works in all countries that is the good news Esther’s email address is estherhadas3m***@yahoo.com,.

    Like

Comments are closed.